The Problem with Non Negotiables

A non negotiable is not open for discussion or modification. A non negotiable is like a contract you’ve made with yourself that cannot be adjusted. For example, you’ve established a daily exercise routine and you will not under any circumstances miss a day of it.

You have to set non negotiables because if you don’t, then you might be swayed into comprising your position and your personal boundaries. You might break your habit, and once it’s broken, you may not get back on track.

The problem with non negotiables is that they take energy to keep them in place. They can take a lot of will power to hold them there. Note, I said, take. And if you have too many non negotiables in place, then you may be losing power rather than gaining it.

The problem with non negotiables is that it’s easier to set and maintain them rather than to trust yourself. To trust yourself that if you need to miss the occasional day of your exercise regime that you won’t be tempted to drop it altogether.

Whereas, if you truly and deeply value your health, and you trust yourself enough to remain true to yourself, and in this case true to your health, then you can afford to be flexible. You can skip a day every now and then without fear of failure.

There’s another problem with non negotiables. A non negotiable works like a DO NOT DISTURB sign that you hang on your door.

While that may be well and good, because it stops people from interrupting you, it also stops everything else from interrupting you. That includes your commonsense and your ability to hear your intuition. Either of which might be trying to tell you that you’re overtraining, or your immune system is low, so you’re in danger of getting sick, or causing yourself an injury. Or you’re too busy doing too much, trying to cram in everything on your to do list around your non negotiables.

Not only do others have to work around your non negotiables. Ok, fair enough. But you’ve created a situation where you’re forced to nonstop figure out how you can work around your own non negotiables.

It becomes a question of: How long do you think you can keep this up without compromising the thing you are trying to achieve or maintain? In this case, it’s your health.

You can end up manifesting the opposite of what you want.

When you can’t trust yourself to be true to yourself and your values under any circumstances, then your non negotiables have the power to sabotage your intuition and your commonsense.

Non negotiables can bias your thinking, create blind spots and narrow your mindset.

Yes. Non negotiables are useful at times. However, flexing the muscles in your personal boundaries will allow you to renegotiate your own contract.