The Paradox of Healing

When you are ill, it is too easy to berate yourself for not healing. Healing is a process and a part of that process may involve forgiveness. Forgiveness is hard. If you are having trouble with forgiveness, you can’t afford to be hard on yourself for not being able to let go. You have to stop berating yourself for not being able to let go or forgive. You undermine your healing process when you continue to pick on yourself. It is difficult to thrive, let alone heal, when you are being bullied. Bullying yourself is not the answer. Each time you berate yourself, you throw one more obstacle in the way of your healing process.

the healing paradox
When the stages of healing are made more important to you than the goal of healing, it is possible to increase your healing outcomes.

In a world that promotes instant gratification, speedy service and fast deliveries, many have been led to believe that quick and instant fixes are not only possible, but are expected. It is too easy to transfer and apply this notion to healing, but by doing so, you are led to expect an immediate cure. It is tempting to go on a never ending search for miracle treatments and cures, instead of concentrating on genuine ways to better manage your situation.

Many health problems develop over a period of time and so it takes time to undo them. They often develop due to deficiencies and/or excesses of things that are good or bad for your health, so it also takes energy to undo health problems.  Your energy needs to be returned to a balanced state of being. Excesses need to be reduced and deficiencies need to be filled up again. With time and energy on your side, you improve your chances of creating better health.

There is rarely an instant fix to correct the damage to health. It takes a series of steps and stages of adjustments and correction to return to health. Step by step, healing is a process of stages. When the fulfilment of these steps and stages is made more important to you than the healing you desire, it is possible to increase your healing outcomes. To put it another way, when you make the journey of healing more important than the goal of healing, your chances of healing may rise instead of fall.

Healing is possible when more of your energy is in the present moment. It is harder to heal if your energy is locked into the past or the future. You can’t expect to heal when most of your energy is stuck in a painful past. By dwelling on the past, you hold your emotional energy and mental energy hostage there, so it is not here now. It is also harder to heal if most of your energy is leaping forward into worrying about the future. By letting your energy run ahead of you into the future, you hold your emotional and mental energy away from you, so it is not here now. Herein lies the healing paradox. When you maintain a be-here-now approach to healing, where healing is a daily, hourly or minute by minute process rather than a deadline sometime in the future, then your chances of healing will increase. You are relieved of the stress created by worrying about the future, and you are relieved of the pressure that builds from constantly dwelling on the past. The past and the future rob you of much needed physical, emotional, mental energy in the present time. When your energy is present, your chances of healing improve.

Sometimes, the only person you need to forgive is you. You have to forgive yourself for not forgiving yourself for your inability to forgive others. You can’t expect to heal if you continue to berate yourself. Healing is a process. Bullying and berating yourself blocks that process. Instead of berating and bullying yourself, be kind to you. Instead of dwelling on the past, or yearning for, or worrying about the future, be here now.

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