Self Awareness Matters

High octane stress will expose your hidden flaws. Seemingly out of nowhere. At the most inconvenient times. In the most frustrating and inappropriate ways. When this happens, you know it’s time to ramp up your self awareness.

Who can say they’ve never experienced a time when they’ve cringed at what they said or did? You know those times when you wish you could crawl under the table or better still, evaporate into thin air. You’re left thinking, was that really me? What just happened? What came over me? What on earth possessed me?

It’s as though a demon stepped in and took control of the situation, and you found yourself acting out of character.

What part of your personality is trying to break through by making itself known to you in this way? What’s happening here?

While it’s tempting to want to control what’s happening when you slip out of character, you can’t. This is because your unconscious is larger than your conscious self. And when it needs to make itself conscious, you don’t want to fight it unless of course, you’re superhuman.

It will always be that way. It’s human nature. To be human is to be imperfect. If it wasn’t this way, then you would be considered a God.

So, what’s happening when you’re caught out of character?

According to Naomi Quenk, psychological type expert, and author of Was That Really Me, it’s your shadow material. And where will you find your shadow material? You know my go to response. Your shadow content can be found in your personality archetypes.

High octane stress, fatigue, illness, alcohol and mind altering drugs will bring out your hidden personality. In this case, it’s the parts you don’t want others to know about. But it’s not all dreadful. There’s plenty of gold content in your shadow too, and you keep that hidden as well, but it’s the lead in your shadow that I’m talking about here.

When you’re stressed or out of sorts, your normally reliable, efficient and effective self becomes inefficient and ineffective. You tend to become careless, so you try harder, become more stressed, but it doesn’t work because in spite of your best efforts, your shadow will insist on making itself known to you.

There will always be something new that your unconscious will direct you to learn because your shadow content is unlimited.

Of course, you can minimise the effects of stress or exhaustion by managing your personal energy budget more effectively. For example by taking more breaks, eating and sleeping well, getting professional support and so on. However, it’s not easy to predict how much stress or fatigue will sideline your usual self and therefore leave the door open for your shadow to disrupt an important situation. It tends to show up at the most inconvenient times. Everyone is different and so are their coping strategies.

Exploring the shadow content in your 12 Personality Archetypes, or as Myss puts it, excavating your unconscious, can give you an idea of your shadow – the lead and the gold – and what you can learn from the episodes. In addition to this, your archetypes will provide you with strategies to manage your high octane stress points.

Recognising what and how it happens, and the conditions your shadow needs to erupt are what you can expect to learn once you identify the unique combination of your 12 Personality Archetypes.

In the end, if you care to throw a light on your out-of-character episodes, then you would stay on top of your personal energy budget. You would attend to your shadow work on a regular basis by consulting each of your 12 Personality Archetypes for insights.

Think of it like house work for your soul. The longer you try to avoid shadow work, then the bigger the eruptions will be. The more often you’ll find yourself asking: How did I end up in such a mess?

Your efforts will have an impact beyond your immediate orbit. According to Lisa Feldman Barrett PhD., psychologist, neuroscientist, and author of 7 and 1/2 Lessons About the Brain, your mind is connected to the collective mind. This means that your personal shadow work can be your contribution to cleaning up the global shadow.

Make shadow work a habit, for more than just personal reasons, because in this case, increasing self awareness matters.

References

Feldman Barrett, L 2020, 7 1/2 lessons a bout the brain, Harper Collins Publishers, New York.

Myss, C 2001, Sacred Contracts: awakening your divine potential, Random House, New York.

Quenk, N 2002, Was that really me? How everyday stress brings out our hidden personality. Davies-Black Publishing, California.